bye Will…

Since Will came back into my life (see “Will be Back“), it has been another whirlwind in the making,  though I was more in control of the situation. I had a handle of things and I didn’t allow the maelstrom that he is to take over this time. He is just too much. I have to admit, it would be very challenging if he were around in the flesh.

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I received a text from Will today. “Good morning my dear. We need to talk. I’m flying out of London asap.” That was my cue.  He’s coming back and this time he will want us to meet. A few days ago, we have been talking about him finishing up all the “business” related to transporting his mother’s remains from the U.S. to her final resting place, next to his father. I have been a very supportive “friend” (not girlfriend), as I promised. I had clear boundaries this time around. It was hard, but I did it.
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I wish I was stronger… but I know I’m not. I’m not ready to see him… I can’t be with him. (Why can’t I have 2 hearts??? Ugh!) I don’t want to disappoint him. It’s better this way. I know myself, I won’t be able to say no to him and he won’t take no for an answer.

I received a text from Will today. “Good morning my dear. We need to talk. I’m flying out of London asap.” That was my cue.  He’s coming back and this time he will want us to meet.

 

I’m not ready to see him… I can’t be with him…. I know myself, I won’t be able to say no to him and he won’t take no for an answer.

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I stared at his message for a bit then I decided it was time to delete him on Skype. That way he won’t see if I’m online or not (I know he stalks me sometimes). I’m not ready to block him on viber yet but at least he’ll think I did if I stop responding.
Baby steps… it’s not easy to say goodbye. I know we’ll end up fighting if I even start that conversation just like the last time. I don’t want to leave a bad taste in my mouth… or his.
Au revoir mon cher… I’m not ready to bid Adieu.

Grosses bises  ♥  Etoile

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One comment

  1. Grandtrines · September 6

    Reblogged this on Still Another Writer's Blog.

    Liked by 1 person

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